Self-confidence is one attribute every person should have in order for him or her to assert himself or herself. Many kids and even adults suffer from lack of confidence.
There are people who lack the ability to make strong decisions in life. Others are unsociable and are almost left alone often, while still others are too reliant on outside opinions and lose the independence of decision making. All these result from a lack of self-confidence.
That is why some parents of children who are exhibiting signs of lack of confidence are taking the problem very seriously. They immediately send the child to a therapy or to a behavioral treatment program.
Self-confidence is a really important for everyone, and lacking it should be treated as a serious problem. A person's future and career certainly depends on whether that person has trait of self-confidence in how they present themselves and solve problems.
Starting to build self-confidence:
People are not born with self-confidence. That trait is developed as a person learns more about the world from infancy to childhood to adulthood. Remember, without confidence, you would not have been able to learn how to walk, talk or do other necessary activities.
People with good self-confidence are those who have a belief that everything in life is achievable if there is proper motivation. Usually, these people are those with positive and cheerful disposition in life. Some observations also indicate that those lacking self-confidence are usually those who have experienced sad or traumatic events in the past. A dysfunctional family life in childhood can fail to provide the modeling needed for a child to emulate.
A simple disappointment can be considered a major event in a child's life, especially if the ill feelings that came along it were not properly addressed. Thus, simple embarrassment can be a major and serious cause of lack of self-confidence in a person. Shame can easily develop.
To start building up self-confidence, it is advised that the person gain and have a positive outlook about life. He should be cheerful and fun-loving and must have a good outlook.
Tips on gaining self-confidence:
Through the years, behaviorists and experts have been sharing some basic and helpful secrets that surely and effectively help people gain and develop self-confidence. Here are some of those simple tips:
Just feel good.
People with confidence are usually those who feel good about themselves. If you feel good about yourself, confidence is a natural occurrence. It makes it easy to talk the talk and walk the walk.
If you find it hard to feel good, there is a simple tip to help you out. Think of good and fun memories, think of a fun activity, or think of a person who really makes you feel happy. Redirect your thinking and use some positive self talk, Some experts advise that thinking of a favorite celebrity or an idol could also help build good confidence and disposition.
The most potent factor in sustaining lack of self-confidence and staying stuck is self-consciousness. Why do people not feel good about themselves? Because they think they are inferior to other people. When people think they are ugly or are less desirable, they start opting to withdraw. When we judge others with our own yardstick we often come up short. Why? Because we are our own harshest critic.
Another tip is to think of other people and how they get things done, then motivate yourself to doing the same. If you want to be a millionaire do what millionaires do.
Keeping busy and productive helps. Remember, idle minds are the workshops of the devil. If you are too bored because you don't have much to do, chances are that you would start noticing yourself and then develop a sense of self-pity and affliction.
Don't criticize yourself.
Criticisms surely are constructive, but often when they come from yourself, they have adverse effects. Self-criticism could lead to too much focus on self and eventually, to the feeling of inferiority, which could lead ultimately to lack of self-confidence.
Lastly, the most effective secret to building up a firm self-confidence is a belief in self, and motivation to succeed. If you keep on comparing yourself to others, you would certainly end up feeling less confident, so stop the habit and focus on the things you can accomplish, and then just do it.