If I were to ask you the percentage of time you spend thinking about what you don’t want, what would it be? And the percentage of time thinking about what you do want?
Experience with my clients has shown me that most of us spend a lot more time thinking about what we don’t want. Some examples when it comes to our job include:
*I hate my commute.
*I am not challenged at my job.
*I wish I didn’t have to travel so much.
*I miss my family.
*I have no energy.
*I don’t get paid enough.
And the list goes on and on. By the end of the day we have spent on average 70-80% of the day thinking about things we don’t want.
Now, what happens when we put our attention on things? They usually come to pass right? Have you ever been really clear on something you wanted, thought about it, took action to get it and finally got it?
Well the same works for the things you don’t want. The more attention you put on them, the more you get of them.
If you want to get out of work that doesn’t satisfy you and find work that does, then you will need to take your attention off of the things that keep you dissatisfied and put it on what you think will satisfy you.
The best way to do that?
Turn your “don’t wants” into “do wants” - The list above is all about things you don’t want, simply flip them into things you do:
*I hate my commute becomes, “I want a short commute.”
*I am not challenged at my job becomes, “I want a job that challenges me.”
*I wish I didn’t have to travel so much becomes “I want a job where I don’t have to travel so much.”
*I miss my family becomes, “I want a job that has better work life balance.”
*I have no energy becomes, “I want a job that gives me energy.”
*I don’t get paid enough becomes, “I want a job that pays me what I think I’m worth.”
By doing this you are starting to create a picture of where you want to go next. Now you will start to get thoughts, ideas, circumstances people and events that will support what you want. Thinking about your don’t wants just invites more of the same.
Client experience has also shown that as soon as you start to put your attention on what you do want, you inevitably start saying one word more often than not…”BUT”.
A sure fire way to stay where you are is to put your attention on what you don’t want and when you do think about what you do want, negate it immediately with “but…”. “I want a short commute, but I’ll never find the job I want close to home.” You know what? You’re right because you won’t take another step to find it.
Eliminate “but” from your vocabulary when it comes to putting your attention on what you want. Simply replace it with, “I will need to…”.
-“I want a short commute, but I will never find the job I want close to home” becomes “I want a short commute. I will need to search for a job I want closer to home.”
When you use the word “but” you hit a wall. You don’t’ take another step because you don’t’ see another step. When you replace it with, “I will need to…” now you have a project, a next step.
If you really want to create work that satisfies you, then start putting your attention on what you do want and stop using the word “but”.
Taking these two simple steps will get you moving and into a career that really satisfies you faster then you can say, “but I’ll never find a career that really satisfies me.”
About the Author
Doreen Banaszak is a coach, teacher & Founder of the “90-Day Get Your Career UnSlumped Challenge”. When you’re ready to get your career UnSlumped and start moving toward work that will REALLY satisfy you, take the challenge at http://www.getunslumped.com!